Meryl Streep and Donald Trump-We All Lose

The Hollywood Foreign Press honored Meryl Streep this week at the Golden Globes. Her impassioned speech sent shockwaves through an already divided country. Depending on which camp you were in she is either a hypocritical phony who should shut up and act, or she is a human rights savior calling out the most evil man on the planet.

 

What is wrong with us? What is wrong with everyone that a speech made by an actress can put us into such frenzy? Why can we not disagree with something someone says without calling for bans and boycotts? And why can’t we agree without declaring someone a saint. For an opinion?!!

 

Of course, just to make matters worse, President-Elect Trump, her target, Tweeted his response using words like “overrated” and “Hillary flunky who lost big.” And people thought that was either an awesome response or that it is more proof that he’s a bully with a big mouth. No in between.

 

I understand the concern about his reactions. I understand his frustration regarding a media that clearly does not like him, but come on, Mr. Almost President, stop giving them so much to work with.

 

But back to us and the point about our conversations on social media. After Ms. Streep gave her speech in which she talked about disrespect inviting disrespect, I attempted to have a conversation with some Hillary supporters, you know those people who were going to go high when “they go low?” When I took issue with a few parts of Streep’s speech, I was told that Donald Trump and every last one of his supporters can go straight to Hell. I responded that it was not a very respectful response only to get another nasty and offensive comment aimed my way. There was no discussion about what I disagreed with. And by the way, I stated that I respect Ms. Streep, her talent, and believe her speech came from her heart. Still, I disagreed, and was willing to explain, but that didn’t matter. I should go to Hell.

 

Not that the other side is any better. I saw comments with the typical offensive names for liberals who live in Hollywood. I saw comments about how she was “destroyed” by this celebrity’s tweet or that celebrity’s comment. Ironically, these were the same people who said she was just a celebrity and should shut up. Those other celebs though, well, we like what they said so let them talk.

 

Then there were all of those pesky pictures being shared of her giving Roman Polanski, an admitted child rapist, a standing ovation. I mean if you’re going to set the Internet on fire, make sure you have covered all bases, right?

 

But you know who the problem is? Not Meryl Streep. Not Hollywood. Maybe, sometimes, not even Donald Trump. We are the problem. We are the ones who seem to have an inability to have civil and respectful conversations. We have become all about the mob mentality, well, the mob mentality on social media.

Oh, and our kids? They are paying attention, so when you’re telling people to go to Hell because they disagreed with you or you’re calling them losers or some of the other lovely names I’ve seen, your kids are watching. My kids are watching. This is what we are teaching them.

 

We can’t blame that on Donald Trump. We’re doing that all on our own.

 

Disagree with what she said. Love it. Discuss it. Debate it. Hash it out. But stop demeaning one another in an effort to make your point, to win the argument. Nobody wins, and what I see passing as discussions lately is just a lot of ugly talk that does nothing but make us look bad.

 

This one’s on us, not the celebrities, not the politicians, not even Donald Trump. This is all on us.

 

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Ask Her More

I want to love #AskHerMore. I really do. But I only sort of like it. Why do women have to choose between being intelligent and being beautiful? It’s very possible for women to be smart, inspiring, funny, successful, and LOVE fashion and beauty. That’s coming from me sitting in my pink fuzzy robe and blue fuzzy pajamas desperately in need of a root job and some blemish cream because my skin does not love red wine as much as my taste buds. If I never had to get out of my pajamas again, I’d be very happy. But, boy do I love a red carpet!

Cate Blanchett called out a cameraman last year for scanning her dress from top to bottom asking him, “Do you do that to the guys?” I’m reasonably sure, not 100%, that a tuxedo is not nearly as exciting as  the dresses. You can be sure that if Blanchett is at an awards show that she will surely be on a best-dressed list. I’m also reasonably sure, though not 100%, that it is not an accident.

So what’s wrong with noticing? What’s wrong with asking? Obviously you put the effort in. Shouldn’t you be happy that we noticed? But it goes further than that. You’re robbing people by wanting to take away from the fashion, you know, the fashion you happen to be wearing.

I love the Oscars. I love that there are people who made their dreams come true. Every actor and actress walking the red carpet represents a dream whether it was the guy who wrote a screenplay that took twenty years to be made, the make-up artist with a glitter-filled childhood, a hairdresser who believed hair was a creation, or the kid with stars in her eyes who later became a Jennifer Lawrence or a Lupita Nyong’o.

They are all part of making magic and that includes designers who break their backs in fashion houses all hoping to become a name, all dreaming of the day that it will be their name coming out of one of those famous  and impeccably made-up mouths on a red carpet.

So yes, ask her more.  Ask her about who inspires her. Ask her what made her pick the film she is nominated for though I don’t know that any actress that will say, “because I thought this one would be box office gold and get me an Oscar.” Ask her more but let’s stop pretending that we don’t love beautiful things. Let’s not pretend as they walk down the red carpet that we’re not all sitting at home admiring dresses, hair and glittery diamonds. Let’s not pretend that we’re also not cringing at some of the choices, because, hello, we are. And we are talking about it. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

Let’s stop making it a choice. Throw out the rule book that says beauty is a bad thing or that love of fashion is shallow. Let’s ask her more but let’s let her tell us who she’s wearing because some kid spent a childhood dreaming of this day just as much as she did. When she’s up there accepting her Oscar, it isn’t just the writers, directors, or her agent that deserve thanks. It’s all of those little people behind that look that she’s offended you’re asking about. Don’t make it a choice. She looks fabulous but she didn’t do that all on her own. Ask her who she’s wearing, because it matters!